2nd fill was Monday and there is just that slightly extra restriction I needed as I was feeling quite hungry between meals the previous week. With all of the pre-surgery research I did, somehow I didn't come across, or at least didn't notice that the optimum tightness of the lap band is so important and so tricky to achieve. I honestly feel that right now is perfect for me. I can still eat bread, fibrous vegetables, rice, dense meats, etc.(all foods that can potentially get "stuck" and come back up) with no issues. Calories range from 1500-2000 a day(keep in mind to maintain my weight I would have to eat 4000 plus). And yet in the past 2 and a half weeks I have dropped 14 pounds. Down 40 now! This time with real food....NOT pre-op and post-op liquid dieting. Have lost 4 inches in my waist and had to buy new pants and jeans yesterday. Still in huge sizes of course:) I'll be a Big & Tall shopper for a good year I would imagine. As emotional as I am I'll probably start crying the first time I can shop at Macy's or Dillard's. Can only imagine the looks I'll get! and I'll probably just keep on crying.
OK, so it isn't all sunshine and Ovaltine. One thing I do battle is not having food as a comfort during rough moments. My parents(as I've mentioned) are both very sick. We are hopeful that Mom can have many good years left, but that is always a huge concern and stress. Dad will not have many good years left, or that many years left period. The stress, worry and devastation of all of this could previously be "medicated" with 4 pieces of fried chicken, potatoes and gravy. Or an 18 ounce Ribeye with a baked potato the size of a toddler's head. 6 ounces of fish and a half piece of bread doesn't really cut it, in terms of comfort food.
All of that said, the whole idea of over indulgence as a comfort is a very unhealthy pattern. And true sustaining comfort will come from being much smaller and much healthier. I value this experience for more than just weigh loss. I value what it teaches me.
No comments:
Post a Comment